What is Sex? Like Seriously WHAT is Sex?

    Like many I love Futurama!  It had a rough beginning, solid middle and an absolutely fantastic ending....until they decided to bring it back......but that's not the point!  In the season 3 episode "Where the Buggalo Roam" Kiff and Amy are laying on the ground making out, until they feel a rumble underneath them.  Amy says "What was that?!" and Kiff responds with "Maybe, we just made love?".  But it does not stop there, as at the end of the episode Amy embraces Kiff in a long kiss where there was another rumble of cow ladybugs running by because it's Futurama, and right after Kiff takes out his diary and writes the following:  "Dear Diary, I just made love for the second time!".  I'm not gonna lie that was so cute seeing him smile and feeling proud of himself!  However, to some people, they would not see what Kiff did as sex, which raises a really good question.  What is sex?  I am not talking philosophically what sex is, I am talking about WHAT is sex, as in what are you doing that makes sex, well sex!?

    Let's be honest, sex education in the United States is the equivalent of a video game without a tutorial level, instead they encourage you to read the instructional manual.  Sadly, the game has no instructional manual so now you have to go online to figure out how to do stuff.......wow that is strangely accurate!  Growing up, no one really told us what sex was; I mean I went to nothing but private religious schools and all they did was show us what different STD's/STI's looked like and just told us to not have sex....oh and you will get pregnant/get someone pregnant!  There is a lot to unpack about that......but we are talking about what is sex!

 

 

    Do me a huge favor, ask yourself what is sex?  How do YOU know if YOU are having sex?  Then if you can, ask someone else, and hear their perspective.  This can be a very unique experience because everyone's perspective will be different!  This is due to how people are raised or what they went through in life; as certain experiences and mindsets can set a sort of expectation as to what it is, and how we apply it to our day to day lives.  Take what I said about Kiff; he believed that when he kisses some one and the ground rumbles then that means he had sex with someone.  By his logic I am a virgin!  But is his perspective is wrong?  Well you have to take into consideration what is it that he knows and views when it comes to sex.

    Fry has had a lot of sex throughout the series, I mean you have Leela, Amy, some amazonian women, and his own grandmother (remember he did the nasty in the pasty)!  But, one person he did not have sex with was a mermaid named Umbriel.  Now he was about to do the deed with her, until he came to a problem; that being she was half fish, and sex was going to be different!  Basically she lays eggs and Fry "fertilizes" the eggs, after she lays them.  After learning of this, fry is seen running away saying "Why couldn't she be the other kind of mermaid, with the fish part on the top and the lady part on the bottom?".  Say if Fry was still there, and he did what he was suppose to do, would that be sex?  Because to the merfolk, they see it as sex.  Does that make it any less of sex than what we do?

     In my day, people would say if you had Anal sex, it isn't real sex so you can get away with not having sex!  Or people would give/receive oral saying that it was not sex.  This can be dangerous, because then people might be less likely to use protection because it "isn't sex" or it isn't "real sex", and lets be honest, that is absolutely NOT SAFE!!!!!  We need to sit down and acknowledge that everyone's perspective is going to be different, but if you are going to do something sexual with someone's genitalia or orifice, regardless if it is labeled as "sex" or not in your perspective, using protection can be HELLA beneficial!

    When it comes to sex I feel what really matters is everything that happens in that moment for you.  What actions happened that gave your body certain pleasure?  What did you do with your partner that they enjoyed?  These are questions that we have to explore to really understand what in the world is sex!  I can give you my perspective on the act of sex, but here's the thing, that's just my perspective, it does not apply to everyone.  All I know is that on my end, when I am having sex, I feel my body tense up, I bite my lip, I feel waves upon waves, of pleasure, and the thought of helping my partner feel great is on my mind as well as one of my roles too.

    I guess what I am trying to say is that at the end of the day, have an open mind to what is the act of sex, and try to explore if you can.  What you view will be different from others, and vice versa.  But if you do meet someone, that your are dating or trying to hook up with, have these conversations and learn, because when you have sex, you want to make sure that everyone knows that they are getting into, and if they are going to enjoy what is going to come!